Thursday, April 17, 2014

NestPitch BP1: Barnabas and Bird

Category/Genre: Younger Middle Grade Fantasy

Word Count: 22,000

Pitch: When Barnabas said "my heart hurts," Bird knew something big was going to happen. Now they must build a flying raft and cross the country before Barnabas can discover Bird’s the one that needs healing.

If the MC was an Easter Egg, what flavor would they be and why? 
Barnabas believes his softness a liability, so he’d be a dark chocolate over marshmallow.

Excerpt: (300 words)


When Barnabas said, “my heart hurts,” Bird knew something big was going to happen.

Bird was right.

It happened on a full moon night when they should have already been dreaming. Restless, Barnabas paced inside his pen. Bird fluttered from her perch on the center pole to the edge of the red and white striped circus tent. A pacing elephant must always be avoided. Even a small one like Barnabas.

Had Barnabas known Bird’s thoughts, he might have protested. But he’d passed his third birthday. He would grow no more. He was the smallest elephant in the circus.

“It’s not fair,” he grumbled. “I hate being tiny.”

Bird, being the friend she was, wisely did not point out that even as the smallest elephant, Barnabas was larger than every other animal in the circus. Barnabas didn’t want to hear it. Barnabas’ large ears were closed to that truth.

Being the friend she was, Bird said, “When my heart hurts, I find it helpful to talk about it.”

“You’re a bird. A canary bird. A yellow canary bird.” Barnabas, fond of stating the obvious, stomped his foot. “What can you know about the hurt in a heart the size of mine? Why, my heart is a thousand times the size of yours.”

Barnabas didn’t understand that the size of the heart had nothing to do with the pain it could feel. But because she was a very good friend, Bird held her words.

“I must leave.” Barnabas paced as flowers swirled at his feet. “How do I heal my heart here, where no one understands? Yes, I will leave.”

“Where will you go?” Bird fluttered to the end of Barnabas’ great trunk and searched his eyes.

The elephant tossed his trunk to the east, flipping Bird into the air. “As far from California as I can.”

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